Some Pics of Vietnam and Elizabeth

Ok I could organize the pictures better and removed some but oh well. Here they are!

Link --> http://picasaweb.google.com/greg.dallari/Vietnam#

See right side of screen for slide show

January 24, 25, 26

January 24, 25, and 26

Our Journey home started at 8:15 am Hanoi time. Houng got us to the airport and helped us cut the line to make our plane on time. We were all checked in but for some reason we could not get our boarding pass from Hong Kong to JFK. It was time to board the plane and they said we were delayed 20 minutes. After about 45 minutes they loaded us on to a bus and we drove out to a plane. We boarded and took off. The flight was very smooth.

We landed at Hong Kong at 2:30 pm their local and were set to depart at 5:30. We found 2 other families with adopted children from Vietnam heading to NY. We chatted about our experiences in Vietnam. Once we landed we picked up our boarding passes. Mary and I found a café and decided to have some Chinese food. The food was very good. At the gate Mary and I asked for a bassinet and they asked two passengers to move so we can sit at the bulkhead. We were the last passengers on board. We got set up and took off on time. The flight had some turbulence and they said during turbulence we could not keep Elizabeth in the bassinet. She was sleeping and it was more of a shaking motion no major drops so we ignored their rule. We landed at 7:30 pm est. a ½ hour ahead of schedule. However, there was no gate to pull into so we sat on the taxiway for the ½ hour. Passengers complimented us for how quite Elizabeth was. We kept her busy with food, toys or walking around the plane.

We caught up to the other families as we waited for boarder control. We were the last group of families in the line and I saw a boarder agent and asked if he could do anything for us (there were about 400 passengers ahead of us) since we had infants. He said give me a few minutes. He went off and then said come here – you are next. I asked about the other families and he pulled them off the line as well. The other families are like, “Who do you know.” I smiled and said we are lucky. Mary, Elizabeth and I made it up to the agent and he opened the packet – we were hoping all the papers were in order. The agent went through the packet a few times saying he is looking for a specific piece of paper – he then looked at me like why are you so nervous. I said if you knew the discussions we have had over papers and besides I am not getting on a plane to go pick it up. He said he found it and we should be all set. We passed through the control and picked up our luggage. We passed through customs without an issue.

As we made it through the gates the entire family was there – holding Vietnam and American Flags with Elizabeth’s picture. The whole event was so overwhelming and just a wonderful sight to see everyone. We carried the luggage to the car and we headed to Mom’s house with the family. Elizabeth was just great with the family – looking around smiling and playing. She really did so well and the family just loved her. To me the greatest moment was seeing Grandma holding Elizabeth and then her realizing that at 92 she is a Great Grandma.

Mary and I crawled up to bed and Elizabeth fell asleep right away. An hour later she woke up screaming and it was daddy’s turn to comfort her. After a while I realized that she was hungry since it was 12 noon her local time. I found animal crackers and her bottle and we ate and played for about 1 ½ then she tipped over in the bed and feel asleep. I was too tired to move her so she slept next to me in bed.

January 25, 2009 – we got up and had breakfast. Elizabeth looked exhausted around 10 so Mary and I worked to help her take a nap. Daddy napped with Elizabeth and then we got up and headed to mass. It was great seeing all the people and all of their support and prayers since they have known about our journey. During mass every time the folk group played Elizabeth would bob back and forth to the music.

We went back to Mom’s house and had lunch and Elizabeth spent some time with the cousins. We gave Elizabeth her lunch and packed the car. We headed home to Poughkeepsie. Elizabeth slept the entire way home.

We arrived in Poughkeepsie and as we pulled up to the house and it was all decorated with balloons and welcome home Elizabeth signs. It was like being at the airport again. It was really nice and touching. Elizabeth started to get acclimated to her house and room. She loved the cats. A little nervous at first as both the cats and Elizabeth were trying to understand each other. We crawled into bed and then Elizabeth woke up a few times in the night but overall a good night. We were just so happy to be in our own bed and home. We really missed the kitties and we could tell they missed us as well.

January 26, 2009 we woke up early. I worked on signing up for Medical, paying bills, signing up for a Dr. appointment and getting that side of the house in order. Mary and I switch and I watched Elizabeth play. Mary took off for food shopping and I played with Elizabeth. She crawled around chasing the cats. Timmy was playing with her as she played with her toys and she was able to pet him. Now when she sees the cats she has a great big grin and laughs. Elizabeth started to look tired so I picked her up and sat in the rocking chair and out she went. Buddy sat on my lap as well so the three of us rested. Mary came home from food shopping and we went to the pediatrician. Once Elizabeth is over her cold we will start the vaccinations. The Dr. said she looked really good. Next week we have another appointment.

We spent the afternoon playing and catching up on sleep. It is just great to be home and we are so grateful for everyone’s support. As I look back at the support of family and friends and the people we have met along the way it is truly amazing and we are grateful.

January 25th

We are on LI enjoying time with the family. Flights were good and more details to come once we get back to Pok this afternoon.

January 22 -- Elizabeth's Birthday!!!

Today we celebrated Elizabeth’s birthday! The day started with her getting to have a waffle at breakfast. She absolutely loved it! We then went off to get tickets to the Water Puppet Theater show which we will see tomorrow. Came back for her nap, then lunch, than met our Canadian friends down in the lobby to hang out and chat. Mr. Haong came by with all of our final paperwork so we are good to go on Saturday. Elizabeth then had her afternoon nap and then we had dinner in the Vietnamese restaurant in the Hilton with the Canadians. We had ordered a cake at the bakery in the hotel and they presented it to Elizabeth complete with candle for our dessert. It was a beautiful cake, white chocolate with raspberry filling and Elizabeth even had a few bites! Oh boy did she love it!

Tomorrow we finish up our packing, go to the water show and then have our final dinner in Hanoi. Two of our Canadian friends leave tomorrow night and we wish them a safe trip. They were wonderful to be with and we will miss their company greatly. One thing that has been cool these past few days is noticing the amount of families that are here who are adopting. A whole bunch are staying at the Hilton with us, while others are staying at the Army Hotel or the Somerset Grand. We seem to keep bumping into each other. We always compare stories and have found that for the most part, all of the babies have been well taken care of here. A few did not receive as good treatment as Elizabeth which makes us count our blessings even more that we were so fortunate to get our little girl in good health.

We can’t wait to come home!!!!!

Monday January 19

Today we had a rather quiet day. I went out early in the morning to do errands and Greg was in charge of getting Elizabeth ready for the day. When I returned an hour later, she was bathed, diaper changed, fed and clothed, happily playing on the floor with her Daddy. Go Daddy!! The only thing that he has yet to try is changing a poopy diaper. He has watched me do it, but he’s not quite ready to take the poopy plunge!

We went off to the Temple of Literature, very lovely with lots of bonsai trees. It was probably the quietest place we have been to and even then, you could still hear the car horns honking in the distance. We then found the Vietnam Fine Arts Museum and looked at some wonderful sculptures and paintings. We walked along the main street near the museum and found all kinds of wonderful art stores. One of the big things they sell here are embroidered pictures but we also found pictures that looked more like sand art. Found a gorgeous one for our master bathroom.

Came back to the hotel so Elizabeth could nap and have lunch and then we just spent the afternoon playing. Her latest thing is something we had only starting doing with her yesterday. I was giving her one of her toys and did the old “Psych” thing to her and she fell into a fit of giggles. Of course today, wouldn’t you know it, she would start to hand Greg or myself a toy and would do the same thing back to us, laughing her head off! I have to say though the best thing by far is that she has started to give me kisses. Yesterday, we were sitting on the floor and she came up to me for a cuddle and put her face right up to mine and let her lips go on my cheek. I didn’t quite know for a second what she had done, but then she did it again, and I realized, oh my God, she just gave me a kiss! What a little love she is!

Our hotel has a really nice restaurant that offers a buffet and we’ve eaten there for dinner now twice because I figured it was a good chance to let Elizabeth try a few things. Nothing major, just some cooked carrot, a little plain chicken, that was pretty much it. It was great to watch her face when she picked up the food because the only other thing she has eaten with her fingers has been Cheerios and some animal crackers.

So tomorrow is our interview with the American Embassy and then we just hang out until the end of the week. We plan to continue doing a little sightseeing everyday – naturally working around Elizabeth’s schedule. We were off a little yesterday – short morning nap, tried to feed her lunch too early and then not enough nap in the afternoon and by dinner, we had a very unhappy little girl – if I so much as put her down for one second, we have full meltdown! We learned quickly and today was back to schedule. Very much looking forward to coming home. It has been lovely here but we do miss everyone and it’s hard for Greg to make sure that he isn’t eating things that contain gluten. We think he has once or twice, possibly soy sauce or barbecue sauce that a restaurant didn’t realize contained it so we’re trying to be a little more vigilant. No point in him feeling unwell the rest of the week. We keep hearing about how cold it is in NY. Kind of weird considering we walk around in short sleeve shirts. 

We’ll let you know how the interview goes!

Newest pictures

Sunday Jan. 18

It’s Sunday and it’s hard to believe that we’ve been here now for over a week. And more importantly, that we’ve been parents for almost the entire time. We went out to dinner with Mr. Haong and his wife and 3 month old daughter last night. It was really lovely, a traditional Vietnamese dinner – prawn soup (very spicy), followed by morning glory salad – it looked like a stringy seaweed with garlic (very delicious), beet salad and fried tofu. Then we had rice, pork and prawns cooked in a honey sauce. What Mr. Haong explained to us was that you tried each thing individually, then when the rice came out you put it into a bowl and added all of the things you had been tasting. So we had the seaweed, tofu, beet salad, and pork mixed in with the rice. Greg and I were good and only used chopsticks.  Then when you finished most of it, a big tureen of soup that had tomatoes and fish in it came out and you added this to what was left so you had a rice soup with all kinds of bits in it. We finished dinner with big pieces of grapefruit.

Now there is a very common thing that happens over here that we had been cautioned about. The Vietnamese love babies, I mean love babies. Every time that Greg and I are walking down the street, people will stop their conversation or whatever it is that they are doing and look at Elizabeth. Usually they will say something like, “Very pretty baby” or “Lucky baby,” etc. Another thing that happens is when you take your baby out to dinner. The serving staff go crazy – coming up and waving at the baby, cooing and also, asking if they can pick your baby up. OK, what’s the big deal? Sounds kind of cute right? Actually it is, it’s really sweet and every place we have gone to, they make a big deal about Elizabeth, asking how old she is, how long we’ve had her, what province is she from, etc. But up until last night, that was pretty much it. Well, last night, one of the servers came up to me, Elizabeth was on my lap and asked if she could hold her. Absolutely I said. And here is the thing that we Americans don’t expect to see happen. She walked away with Elizabeth. I mean, clear out of the room, taking her completely out of sight, showing her off I guess to the other servers. Thank goodness we had been told that this was normal, because I think I would have had a very different reaction otherwise. She kept Elizabeth with her for about 15-20 minutes, so guess what? I got to finish my dinner without Elizabeth on my lap! (They didn’t have high chairs so it was my only option.) Greg and I kept joking around with Mr. Haong after a while, saying “Didn’t we have someone else with us?” and “What was it we came to do in Hanoi?” He loved that we had a sense of humor about it and was glad to see we didn’t freak out. He also said to us that he has worked with many families and he doesn’t remember ever seeing a child respond so well in such a short time to her new family. He was there the day we got her and has watched her just blossom over the past week with us. How much we can take credit for, I don’t know but it felt good to hear that we seemed to be doing something right.

So today we decided to do a little shopping. We went into the old French quarter and all I can say is that it is very stressful shopping there. The streets are narrow, there is hardly any room on the very small sidewalks so you are forced at times to walk right in the road with mopeds whizzing by. The streets remind me of the European cobblestone alleys. There is a whole street with baby things, lots and lots of decorations for Tet – the Vietnamese New Year. A whole street of hardware, it was endless. We did some bargaining here and there, bought some decorations for Tet, I found an adorable set of carved Vietnamese musicians. Elizabeth was starting to fidget – she had been in the Snuggly for almost 2 hours so we decided to head back to the hotel for a diaper change and a bottle - there was literally no place for me to put her to do either.

We then went to the Hanoi Towers which is a large hotel with some small shops on the ground level. We had lunch there – we actually ate salad – we had been avoiding any uncooked fruits and vegetables simply because of the quality of the water and oh man, have I missed my roughage! We were told that the salads there were safe to eat.

Headed back to the hotel for Elizabeth’s nap and then we went to a shopping mall that is about 3 blocks from the hotel to finish getting things we wanted to bring home.

Good news is that we are scheduled for our US Embassy interview on Tuesday afternoon which means that we will then have finished all necessary paperwork and will be cleared to travel on schedule! We plan to see the Temple of Literature and maybe catch a few museums before we leave at the end of the week. We will miss spending time with our Canadian friends, they have been simply wonderful and have made this trip so much easier. I won’t miss the constant honking of car and moped horns though. It does begin to grate on your nerves after a while!!

January 15/16

Ah! We’ve been busy the past few days and I haven’t had a chance to update! OK, the last thing I had said was that we were taking Elizabeth to the clinic to have her checked. Good news, all is well. She does not have an earache. She had a cold, a slight sore throat and a little bit of an upper respiratory infection – all treatable with antibiotics. It was a good visit with the doctor, we talked about how much she should be eating, how much liquid I should be giving her, etc. We got Elizabeth back to our room and started her on her meds. Let’s just say that we all had a great night’s sleep. The next morning, was Wednesday and we took it easy, giving her a chance to play in the room, stay warm, drink lots of fluids, etc. I am grateful to our Canadian friends because changing Elizabeth’s diaper was very difficult. She does not like being on her back. Well, one of our Canadian friends suggested we put a pillow behind her head so she was a little more elevated. Bingo! Much easier now to do. We also tried putting a towel in her crib for her to rest her head on, I noticed that she had used a soft doll we had put in her crib to lean her head on. Worked like a charm. So we’ve got the whole system worked out. Every morning when she wakes up, we sit on the floor and have a small handful of Cheerios while her rice cereal is being made. She is a wonderful eater, doesn’t fuss and seems to enjoy everything we give her – Baby Gerber carrots this week, applesauce and yogurt. After breakfast we get dressed and then playtime. She is obsessed with her little bowls and spoons, pretending to mix and feed herself and now us!

Usually around 11AM, Greg takes her in the stroller for a walk around the hotel and she goes out like a light – every time. She naps for about an hour to an hour and a half and then wakes for lunch. Same routine, Cheerios while cereal is being made and then we use the afternoon to go out. Afternoon nap, dinner out with our Canadian friends, she enjoys sitting in the high chairs that the restaurants have and then bedtime. Once again, Greg walks her around, and then we transfer her into the crib. Not a whimper of protest. We’ve slept great now for the past three nights. We all wake up refreshed and ready for the day.

Elizabeth now has her Vietnamese passport, she had her official checkup and is cleared for travel, and we had her visa application pictures taken yesterday so now all we are waiting on is our US Embassy interview which Mr. Haong is trying to schedule for Tuesday morning, assuming the embassy is open what with the inauguration. Otherwise, it will be on Wednesday and we can definitely return home on Saturday as planned. Today we plan to see one of Hanoi’s cultural shows – the Water Puppet Theatre. Now that everything with paperwork seems to be done, and Elizabeth is feeling better and is more comfortable with us, we plan to do some sightseeing and shopping. Greg was measured for a custom made suit – it was something we were told he should take advantage of because it is very inexpensive.

Last night out at dinner, we saw a side of Elizabeth we didn’t know existed. If you didn’t know better, she looked a bit tipsy! All of a sudden she kept singing out this one letter, “A!” Big smile on her face, looking around at all the people in the restaurant, and then the best was that she has decided that playing with my sunglasses is fun. She pulls them off my face and then has me put them back on so that she can pull them off again. Big laugh, big smile, all four of her little teeth shining, wheezing away with this laugh of hers. We all were in tears, we were laughing so hard, because we hadn’t expected it of her. The other 2 babies we have been with, Benjamin and Olivia giggle all the time, not Elizabeth, she has been the serious one so far. Now we know that she’s just been making us wait.

January 13/14

So today is Wednesday and we fortunately have nothing planned. Last night was a bad sleep night. We got Elizabeth off around 8:30PM and we soon followed after. We were awakened by a phone call around 10, then Elizabeth began coughing around midnight, so I got up to check on her. Back to bed and then up again at 2AM because Elizabeth was howling up a storm. Nothing would get her to stop except for Mommy to hold her so she fell back to sleep on my stomach and I laid awake the rest of the night. I was able to move her onto the bed for about 3 hours and then she began howling again. We have a feeling she has an earache, she still has a cold but it seems to be getting better – we are going to the SOS International Clinic tomorrow for her checkup so we’ll find out for sure.

Yesterday had been a really great day. I went off in the morning to apply for her passport leaving her in Daddy’s capable hands. Well, Daddy fed her breakfast for the first time and ended up wearing it! Yup, rice cereal and applesauce! Greg was thinking of starting a new fashion trend. Well, when I got back, I was thrilled to find out that our little princess crawls! When Greg went to wash out a bowl in the bathroom, apparently Elizabeth wanted to see where he was and proceeded to crawl across the room! She also can stand herself up.

Another first for us is that she loves Cheerios. I put a few in a bowl just to see what she would do. Well, you should have seen the look on her face when she began chewing! Pleased as punch and finished them off in record time. I gave her a few more and put the bag away in the tv cabinet where I am storing her food items. About 10 minutes later, she crawled over, pulled out the bag, looked and me and said, “Unh!” I guess I know now whose boss.

We met up with our Canadian friends for dinner – had a bit of an adventure.
We took a cab to the restaurant, found out the place didn’t open until 6:30, it was 5 at the time. We asked the owner if another restaurant that we had been recommended was nearby and he said, yup, about 500 meters. So we set off, occasionally asking a guard on the street if we were heading in the right direction because it seemed to be taking forever. Meanwhile, mopeds and cars are whizzing by, horns honking continuously when we finally got to one man who said the address we had didn’t exist. The numbers on the buildings didn’t go up to 118 which was what we had on the paper. So we figured, it was getting close to 6, let’s head back to the first place, there was a whole bunch of stores with artwork, we’ll take a look and then have dinner. We are really glad we did because the place was wonderful, food was great, atmosphere lovely, and they had highchairs for the babies! Elizabeth fussed for about a minute about not being on Mommy’s lap until she saw the little bag of Cheerios that Mommy brought – oh yeah, I got her number now!

Today we are just going to hang around – really too tired to do much else. I went out to the local grocery store to pick up some cereal and milk and Elizabeth was hysterical all morning because apparently I was supposed to be sitting with her, not getting ready or cleaning up the room. Greg, (God bless him) remembered the stroller we brought and put her in it and took her for a stroll around the hotel. Now we have something that he can do with her when I need to go somewhere or just get a break. Only problem is that he got chastised by some of the staff here because she wasn’t wearing a jacket and her pants weren’t pulled all the way down to her ankles. (They’re not mean about it, very respectful, but very insistent that we follow through.) That is one thing it takes getting used to here. Greg walked down the street yesterday in a shirt and shorts, but Elizabeth has to have on long pants, long sleeve shirts, socks pulled up as high as they can go, a jacket zipped up and a hat and gloves. I refuse to do the gloves because its 65 degrees here. I got yelled at yesterday by an old lady because her hands weren’t covered. Oh well.

Anyway, we go to pick up her passport tomorrow, we are rushing it because the US Embassy is closed on Monday and we’re not sure what the deal is with Tuesday with Obama’s inauguration. We will then go to the clinic to have Elizabeth get her checkup which is required for her visa. We hope to apply for the visa on Friday.

Took some video of Elizabeth doing the whole Cheerio retrieval thing – pretty funny and oh yeah, she loves the movie Happy Feet! I had turned on HBO just to see what was on and she whipped her head around when she heard the music!

Its official and Pic of Angie -- Elizabeth's friend from the center!

Pictures!

Picking up Elizabeth!!

Well, it’s Monday January 12th at about 2:40PM and Greg and I are sitting in our hotel room with a very little person who is drinking her first bottle with us! We left the hotel at 8:15AM with all of our bags containing gifts for the caregivers, officials and the director of the center. Mr. Haong, our coordinator here, picked us up and we headed out for Hai Duong. It was about a 1 ½ hour drive and it was a beautiful day. As we were driving, Mr. Haong received a phone call of his cell that our G&R was moved up even more! Instead of 2PM, they wanted to meet us at 10:30AM! The only sad thing about this was that it limited our time at the center greatly. We spent maybe ½ hour at the center with Elizabeth’s caregiver, Greg had a few minutes to walk around and take pictures while I sat with the caregiver showing her pictures of our house and family. They loved them, especially our cats!

It was hard to leave because the caregiver obviously loved Elizabeth very much, she kept wiping tears from her face as I kept saying thank you to her over and over in Vietnamese. With the exception of what appears to be a bad cold, Elizabeth seems to be in good health. No scabies or rashes, good weight, very alert, and can sit up and also stand if held.

We left the center and went off for what is called the Giving and Receiving Ceremony – it’s like a court date. We met the director, the officials and they proceeded to go through the paperwork quickly. The head official made a short speech, asking us to take our responsibility seriously, to take care of Elizabeth. We in turn thanked him for trusting us and promised to fulfill our agreement. A few pictures were taken with the official, the director and wouldn’t you know it, Elizabeth slept through the whole thing on my shoulder! I mean, hello! This whole ceremony is for her and she’s out like a light! 

We left and headed back to Hanoi, Elizabeth sound asleep in the van in her Daddy’s arms. I was able to take some video of the area. We got back to the hotel and gave Elizabeth a bath (which she liked), changed her (which she didn’t like) and then spent some time with her just letting her play with some blocks. She kept looking around for the caregiver so I know it’s going to be a few days before she really gets comfortable with us but she had a bottle and is out for the count again.

Happily, she likes the milk we got, a Vietnamese brand of Parmalate with some formula mixed in. She also holds the bottle which was a happy discovery. The only problem we may come across is when it’s time for bed because she does not like laying on her back to get changed so we’re waiting to see what happens when she goes in the crib. Of course, right now, she is asleep on her back on her Daddy’s tummy so go figure!

Tomorrow I have to go with Mr. Haong to the US Embassy to start the passport process and then in a few days we take Elizabeth to the clinic for her checkup. So right now, things are going really terrific! The only stinky thing to deal with is that our sleep is all out of whack. We both fell asleep last night around 9, then both woke up, wide awake at 11. Read for about 2 hours and sort of fell back asleep but not entirely. Like Elizabeth, we will need a few more days to adjust but if this is the only thing we have to deal with, that’s fine!!

We will post again in the next day or so!!

Our first day in Vietnam

January 10, 2009

Today, we had our first day in Vietnam and we spent a few hours wandering around the city. Mary and I woke up at 4am, learned how to use the internet, and then headed for breakfast.

After breakfast we headed out on to the streets and decided to find the lake. The city is really indescribable. The mopeds are like all the cabs in NYC. Very few traffic lights so you must cross at your own peril. Not so bad as long as it’s just the mopeds – the cars and buses we make sure to wait until they have passed. There are parts that remind us of NYC or London. Then there are other parts that look like Prague with the narrow streets and shops. The city offers a very unique experience. You feel safe since there are many police. However, it is different with the people eating on the streets (like NY where you can get a hotdog) however there are very small chairs that people sit on and just hang out. Many people come up to try and sell you things. They are very persistent.

Overall the city is getting ready for Tet (the New Year Celebration) so many things are getting decorated. We found the lake and strolled around. Then we found the shopping district. It is a lot to take in. It is a little confusing converting money from VND to the dollar. If something costs 16,000 then it is a $1.00. Mary and I walked around for about 3 hours. There is pollution so your throat gets a little soar. We have seen guys carrying 42” TVs, and many boxes to be delivered all on mopeds. How they keep their balance we will never know (I certainly do not plan to drive in Vietnam). We’re waiting for a cow or a pig on the back of one of these things. It’s just a matter of time!

We made our way to the Army hotel and found the group from Canada. We have been chatting over the internet and now we have met in person. They are terrific! They have received their children so they shared with us stories of the orphanage. What I found funny is how easy it was for me to talk about NY. We were talking about the Visas and said oh yeah we drove down to NYC to drop them off and a few days later we drove back down. They wish that they can drive down to NY just as easily. We talked about formula, the SOS clinic, and how we will spend our days.

Mary and I stopped at the supermarket picked up a few things, had lunch at the hotel, and then took a nap. We got ready and headed to the Army hotel to meet up for dinner. We headed to an Italian place. The food was excellent and we had a great time talking. We learned more about Elizabeth, the center, and Angie. (She is a little girl, 3 years old, who will be adopted by a lovely woman we have spoken with who lives in Manhattan.) They shared with us that Angie and Elizabeth are very close and how Angie would show off Elizabeth to everyone who came to the center. We know that once we pick up Elizabeth this will break Angie’s heart. The good news is Angie should be adopted next month. We will be able to tell Angie that we will see her soon once her mommy comes to get her. We think it is great that we have the opportunity to have a friend for Elizabeth who grew up with her at the center.

It is amazing where this journey has led us and we will see where it leads in the future.

Arrival in Vietnam.

January 10, 2009

Our flight was uneventful all the planes were on time and we made it to Hanoi. We enjoyed our 4 hours in China. Once we got to Hanoi a man was standing at the end of the escalator with our names on it. We were hoping it was our contact. It was a government official who took us aside to complete our Visa paperwork. Our Visas were delayed coming up from Washington to NY. The NY embassy must have contacted the folks in Hanoi and they handled the paperwork without any issue.

Once we grabbed our luggage we meet our New Beginnings contact. He told us great news that our G&R moved to Monday, January 12. We will make the trip to the center on Monday and we will see Elizabeth for the first time. We will be able to bring her back to the hotel and then work with the US Embassy to bring her into the country.

As we drove through the city streets the city is just beautiful. The architecture of the houses is just so interesting. We cannot wait to see it in the daylight. We got to our hotel and it is just wonderful. We have a big spacious room with a king size bed. Elizabeth’s toys are all unpacked and waiting for her. Monday I will be able to play with her.

January 11, 2009 Mary and I plan to walk around the city and check out some of the sights. This will be our last day without Elizabeth. We figured this will give us time to see where all the stores are so when we realize we need something we can quickly go out and find it.

We will try to update the blog as we can (as Internet turns off at certain times)

After Monday we will look up some of the contacts we know in Vietnam to hopefully visit some people who we have met on the Journey or have learned about from a friend of a friend.

Ready for takeoff

January 9, 2009

Dear Family and Friends,

As Mary and I are getting ready for takeoff we realized that the journey to Elizabeth is about to end. The journey with Elizabeth is about to begin and will last a lifetime. If you are reading the blog many of you know the struggles with adoption and many of you have been on our 3 ½ year journey and we welcome the new members aboard.

I would like to take a few minutes to reflect on the journey. Besides I am on a plane for the next 16 hours between NY and Hong Kong and you know you I cannot sit still. There will be no names listed in this writing because I do not want to leave anyone out. Many of you have supported us with stories, actions or just listening and we would like to thank you for all you have done.

The journey started with Korea and we sat down at dinner with two close friends and asked if they would be a reference for us. They looked at us and knew we would make great parents and gladly accepted the challenged. Others assisted us with references. We thank all who wrote the letters and answered all the social workers questions. Over the next few months Mary collected all the paperwork. During that time Korea changed its policies so we decided to change to Vietnam. Mary and I wrote our essays, fingerprints (which apparently expire), and many other invasive processes and questions. They really wanted to make sure we wanted to be parents.

Many of you know me as impatient, demanding or pushy. I always wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. The delays in the adoption gave me a lot of self doubt. At a time when I was down a friend offered me so much support by saying that I am a good person, have a very strong work ethic and how I am going to love being a father. My priorities would change but that is ok because you will want to be there for her first steps, first car ride, and any other firsts. I realized that my “cathedral” view of where I saw myself and where I wanted to go left me a little lost and confused. I did a lot of soul searching which many of you listened to me and offered me perspectives of being a parent.

In the March/April timeframe Mary and I were so far down asking ourselves if we should continue with the adoption or retire early. One of my college friends had their first child a baby girl on my birthday. We were so excited for them and they shared photos and videos of their child. Other family and friends were pregnant and we shared in the excitement. Of course we would ask, What about us? I emailed a friend and said I am committed to be a parent. Some friends said, “Let go and Let God.” Or offered me inspiration to say I can only control what I can control and let go what I cannot control A friend took me out for lunch on April 4th, and he understood exactly where we at with the adoption and he talked about his journey to his daughter. After lunch I went back to my office and the message light was blinking. I sat down and ignored the message for about an hour saying what work problem now. Once I listened to the message it was our agency and they said they found a beautiful girl who needed a home.

I ran down the hall and stopped in a friend’s office and shared the news. I was so happy to hear it was a girl. I was just replaying and saying out loud what I had heard. I had no idea it would happen on that day. A few weeks ago Mary and I agreed on a name if it was a girl. We chose Elizabeth. I ran home from work and was so excited. I chatted with family and friends. Mary came home and I listened to her day and then I shared with her the news. In hindsight I should have been in the driveway with a huge smile. We envisioned our newly constructed house with Elizabeth playing. Over dinner the excitement continued. The next day we received pictures and she was conceived in our hearts.

All of a sudden the relationship between US and Vietnam changed its policies. We knew that the US paperwork had to be done by September otherwise we could get locked out. We were so nervous and had our paperwork submitted the next day. We waited and waited for the US to approve our paperwork. Finally on June 3rd, a friend’s birthday, we received word that our paperwork was received by the US Embassy. We celebrated my friend’s birthday and we were just so happy about this news. We believed that this started our “60 day clock which put our date to travel at the end of August.

As we waited and waited at the beginning of August we learned that our fingerprints expired. We worked with homeland security to have our fingerprints redone. We kept saying what else could go wrong (especially as we heard about other families struggling). On 9/11 we received our I-600 approval. Other friends who received their I600 approval were given their G&R date the same day. We received email that hopefully we would be able to travel in the October/November timeframe. Early in Thanksgiving I went on a hike with family and they supported me (not sure why I had to wear a brown coat with antlers in the woods). Then as we approached Thanksgiving we knew that window was lost. I reached out to a friend that Mary had met on-line from Canada. We were questioning again should we give up and hope that someone else could offer Elizabeth a loving home or keep trying? The friend from Canada helped us so much by sending us pictures of Elizabeth and had someone she knew write us a letter. A group from Canada adopted children in October so that contact wrote to us about Elizabeth and her personality – what a wonderful loving child Elizabeth is. It gave us hope to keep waiting. We found a friend who lives in NYC waiting for her daughter. We have shared stories and supported each other during the wait.

A few friends recommended Love and Logic series of books to read. I ordered them from the library and read them. When I was done I said Mary you have to read this. She has been applying the technique in school and says it has worked magic. We plan to try it at home. Another friend surprised me when I walked in from work with a book from Amazon. It gave a man’s approach to raising a daughter. I keep reading that book over and over again. I cannot wait to try out these books.

Today, we are on the plane. Many of you have helped me with patience, enforced the message to enjoy each moment. It is hard when we are racing ahead with our dreams and goals to take a minute to realize that our greatest gifts are right in front of us. Everything happens for a reason and I have enjoyed (even when I was down) the time you have spent with me. Support was given over a breakfast, walking for coffee, lunch, dinner, movies, desserts, walks, phone calls, email or IM. All of these moments are special and help define us as people.

I have learned it takes a community to raise a child and now I know Elizabeth is lucky because her daddy has been influenced by you. All of you have given me the gift of your time.

It is amazing how many of the people on the journey I have never met physically can make such a difference. The blog is modeled after another person’s who I emailed. We started chatting and I wrote something for her blog. A few weeks later she said someone found it inspiration that they used it as part of their Christmas Cards.

If we use the song from Avenue Q (play is not recommended for children)…”If you help others you cannot help helping yourself.”

Thank you all for your support on this journey. We understand that friends come and go but their influence will last a lifetime. We look forward to sharing our Journey with Elizabeth.

Traveling!!!!

Today (1/2), we received word that our court date is Wednesday (1/14) at 1:30 pm We will be travling soon to Vietnam and will be updating the blog with pictures.

Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers!!